I have been thinking about this all afternoon and evening.
My best friend from college called me this morning. We haven’t spoken in a while, and she had left me a voicemail a few weeks back which I didn’t get around to returning. So, in the conversation, I was talking about my days and how full they are with Nik’s schools and therapies. And she wondered what was going on, and I realized I hadn’t told her that Nik was on the autism spectrum. So I did, and I heard her suck in her breath, and then she said, Oh I am so sorry.
I’m not.
I may have been, back when he was two, and I was realizing how he wasn’t the same as his playgroup buds. I may have been when I was obsessively comparing his milestones to others’. But he is still the same little boy, who I love absolutely, and who is just so endearing to everyone. He brings so much joy to others. He is a handful, but then so are neuro-typical kids.
I am not sorry for anything about him.